September 2005

I don’t really have any pearls of wisdom to impart to the world today. Plus I am fairly busy at work, things are really starting to pick up and it looks I will do a lot of travelling next year to places like Dubai, Toulouse, Paris, Barcelona, Dallas etc.

At the moment my brain is getting heavily worked up over what I am going to do during the Xmas/NewYear break. I would love to go to Vietnam, Ho Chi Minh City, former Saigon for you plebians out there, to visit my mum. The problem is that there are no direct flights there and consequently I have to stop over in Bangkok, Hong Kong, Singapore etc which means that I am also on route with all the Aussies, Kiwis etc returning home for Xmas. Naturally all flights are well booked up and ticket prices are so high they’ve got snow on them. £1500 is a lot of money just to visit Vietnam for Christmas!

Vietnam and Cambodia are places I would love to visit and maybe for the money it might be wiser to go sometime in November or early December. That leaves Xmas and New Year open, any suggestions?

My god, 1 million aids orphans in South Africa by next year. 7 years ago in 1998 I remember being told this stat by a South African social worker when I was chauffering a United Nations delegation out to Shongweni. She told me that at our current rate of infection SA would have a million Aids orphans by 2005. How right she turned out to be and I now feel vindicated having quoted her soundbite countless times when assuaging other peoples optimism about SA’s burgeoning economy. What people don’t realize is the enormous financial impact not to mention moral burden this will have on South Africa.

If we assume that most of these children have HIV/Aids themselves then we can also assume that they will never live to reach a productive stage of their lives. These children will still have to be housed, fed, educated etc. but they will never get to an age where they are able to contribute to the country economically or socially.

So while 800 people die every day in South Africa…………..pause to let that sink in………………..our Minister of Health, Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, continues to insist that it is better to eat spinach than administer Anti-Retrovirals. What a joke. How long will it take the masses in our country to realise the synonym for “The ANC’s Aids Policy” is actually “GENOCIDE.” Read the rest of this entry »

Last night I got home just in time from the A1GP (more on this later) to catch the last few holes of the Presidents Cup Golf Tournament. What an namazing golf tournament it turned out to be. This has undoubtedly become mine and Jack Nicklaus’s favourite competion in golf. After the last Presidents Cup in South Africa Jack Nicklaus told the world that it was the best competion he had EVER been involved in and I make him right. Last time the trophy was shared but this time after 180 holes of golf it came down to the last putt of the last match. Team USA managed to secure the victory over the Rest of the World team and take the Cup.

The most greatest thing about this tournament was Gary Player. The man is 70 years old and he lead the “World” team like a true legend! I was never a big fan of Gary prior to this tournament but seeing him this weekend made me marvel at what make this man tick. He was so full of enthusiasm and good humour that I believe it rubbed off on the entire tournament. The camera followed him down the 18th at one stage where a few of the players some 40 years his junior were driving golf buggy’s whilst he insisted on walking. It is no wonder people around the world have the umost respect for the man and his conduct.

Quote of the week - Gary Player at the opening ceremony: ” In our team we also have the current US Open winner Michael Campbell from Australia………errr……errrr………New Zealand ……….Sorry, always remember when you get to 70 you’re allowed a Mulligan”

Now heres something interesting. I was at a friend of mine Rachel’s birthday dinner and for whatever reason the song “Sugar Man” by Rodriguez came into my head. I started singing the song expecting all at the table to rise up in unison and belt out the harmonious chords, but alas not one person had EVER heard the song. OKAY you’re thinking, they must have heard “I Wonder”, which is what I thought so I tried that one out for an embarrassing laugh. No chance, nobody had heard it. It then dawned on me that obviously Rodriguez wasn’t a big hit in the UK. OKAY THEN, no massive problem there, nobody here as heard of the Dave Matthews band or the Violent Femmes either.

To my amazement I have subsequently established that Rodriguez was only popular in South Africa and Australia. He never sold an album anywhere else in the world and yet in South Africa he has a cult following and his music is as recognizable as U2, Coldplay, Jimi Hendrix etc. I am absolutely flabbergasted. He has sold more albums in SA than the rest of the world combined and some of his albums have only been released on CD in South Africa. I have attached the remarkable story below of the Great Hunt for Rodriguez about a South African mans pilgrimage to find the great musician and take him back to South Africa 30 years after his albums started selling there. Everybody thought he was dead, ask anybody before he was “re-discovered” and they would have told you he committed suicide or OD’d.

You have to read this, this is the story of the man who found Rodriguez, alive, old and well, living in Denver and because of this story about to TOUR LONDON and CAPE TOWN again!!!! Read the rest of this entry »

“Viva Kolonia” was the song of this years Oktoberfest and boy did I belt it out. Just trying to find and Mp3 of the song now and thought I’d better post so everyone knows I’m alive. I had a ripsnorting 3 days with my Barrash buddy Kramer. Seriously it is hard to do justice to your personal enjoyment over 3 days of the biggest festival in the world by typing it out in a short post late on Friday afternoon. Believe me there is a lot to tell but for now we’ll keep it as a surprise for when I next bump into you. Ask me what it was like, encourage me to be open about it, goad me into telling you and I assure you there will be no disapointment.

It is hard to explain it if you haven’t been. It is hard to explain how Kramer and I are if you haven’t been with us, Kirk, Russell and Truman will testify to that, this year they were sadly missed!

The photos will probably explain more than my words so, if my computer gets fixed in the next few weeks and Pat says a few Hail Marys I might, might, be able to post some more photos soon. Ain’t that a treat, ‘cos you know I love you guys.

Our trip to the Oktoberfest starts …..TODAY. I am hell excited!

We have to spend tonight in Dusseldorf, it could be tricky, where are we gonna stay………….

See ya next week, hopefully in one piece………..Woooohooooooo

It just had to happen didn’t it. Gillette are about to launch a new razor with 5 blades. Actually the new razor sounds pretty cool but you have to ask yourself where does it all end, I mean, at what point has a razor reached blade saturation.

First we had the revolution, I was there and I remember it well, 2 blades in a razor and it was called - Gillette Mach 2 ! That was around 1995 if I’m not mistaken and since then we’ve had the Mach 3 and the even more ingeniously named Quattro from Schick. The new razor has a new name, this one is thankfully original and is called - Fusion. I like the trimmer on the back……

NEW YORK - Gillette Co. Wednesday unveiled its newest shaving system, a five-bladed razor called Fusion with a trimmer on the back of the cartridge aimed at the 50 percent of men who have mustaches and beards.

Fusion is Gillette’s latest product geared at maintaining the company’s leading share of the world’s razor and blade market.

It has one more blade than the Quattro sold by rival Schick, a unit of Energizer Holdings Inc., plus a trimming blade on the back of the pivoting cartridge for shaping facial hair, trimming sideburns and shaving under the nose.

Gillette was the first company to sell a three-bladed razor, Mach3, in 1998. Five years later, Schick followed with the four-bladed Quattro.

Schick is adding a battery-powered Quattro to its lineup this month, while Gillette’s Fusion — in both manual and battery-powered models — won’t hit North American stores until early next year.

In two weekends time Nuts (gentlemens magazine) and Fosters ( Beer- stupid) are going to be throwing one helluva party at the Excel Centre in London. The biggest exhibition centre in the city will host Weekend at Daves. It sounds bloody fantastic and I’m really proud to be associated with it. The story goes something like this ……….

Put down your remote controls/console control pads/girlfriends – it’s time for the first ever event designed especially for men! Hosted by Fosters, Nuts… and of course Dave.

From 23-25 September 2005, acres of London’s Docklands will be devoted to pure partying. Ogle girls, gawp at super-cars, visit Partypoker.com’s casino - then play football with the game’s legends! You even get to meet the Boys Stuff team and play with some of our latest and greatest toys and gadgets! Oh, and some woman called Abi Titmuss is one of the hostesses. Apparently she’s quite popular with some of you gentlemen. Boys, we give you Weekend at Dave’s.

Dave’s an ordinary bloke, just like the rest of us, into partying, cars, women, etc. Except three years ago his nan gave him a pound for a lottery ticket, and he won £23 million. Since then he’s been living the ultimate playboy lifestyle across the globe, following Jordan round the F1 circuits and touring with the Chilli Peppers. But now he’s decided it’s time to put something back. No, he’s not buying his nan a new hip; he’s throwing a three-day party. And you’re invited.

Among the sponsors of Weekend at Dave’s are Fosters lager and the weekly birds and boozing bible Nuts. For three days at London’s Excel, you can leave adult responsibilities behind and give yourself up to pure hedonism. As well as the delectable Ms Titmuss, the Nuts team will be bringing you the Nuts Babe 2005 contest. But best of all is the world tour – your chance to enjoy Dave’s jet-set lifestyle for yourself.

The Weekend at Dave’s event is split into ten themed zones based on the world’s greatest cities and resorts:

Las Vegas – Roll them bones at the PartyPoker.com casino, complete with poker school.

Monte Carlo – Petrolhead heaven with the best modified cars, F1 simulators, pit-stop challenges, full-size go carting track, Gumball 3000 super cars…

Ibiza – The world capital of clubbing comes to London. Chill out by day with a long cool drink; soak up the sounds by night with PAs by top DJs and live music acts (TBA). Open ‘til late.

Los Angeles – Live like Hollywood’s beautiful people with a pool party complete with mineral baths, steam pods and plunge pools, plus a styling zone. There’s also a movie jukebox loaded up with best ever bloke movies.

Dublin – Enjoy the craic at the ultimate Irish bar with Page 3 barmaids, comedy from Jongleurs, and darts and snooker with the pros.

Sydney – Oz’s favourite beer, Fosters, is served in an authentic Walkabout Bar by the beach, where you can play beach games, enjoy water sports, and eat from a genuine Aussie barbie.

Tokyo – Home of the gadget. Try the world’s latest and greatest in Dave’s Ultimate Bachelor Pad, brimming with the best in Hi-Tech gear.

Barcelona – WKD bring you some of the biggest names in football, with penalty shoot-outs, skills tests and maybe even be the odd talent scout!

New York – The most exciting city in the world. Sony Ericsson bring you the high fashion of 5th Avenue, with a department store of essential labels and retailers, combined with the street life of Bronx, with BMX and skateboard demos, batting cages and basketball courts.

Last night I made my way down to the Walkabout in Wimbledon to catch a live and free performance by South Africa’s current rock pin-up boy Arno Carstens. The crowd was loving him, obviously everyone had heard his latest album ‘cos they were all singing along, I joined them for the song that Peksta continually played when I was back home, Universe whatever. Allegedly the Universe song is not cool anymore ‘cos its been played to death, well, FiveFM listeners, we were loving it last night! The biggest cheer went up for an old Springbok Nude Girls number, Blue Eyes. Let me tell ya those boykies made some awesome music. The nudies are still number 1 in my eyes!

The primary reason for my visit to the Walkabout was to get some practise in before the impending mayhem and pandemonium brought about by quaffing a forgetable amount of beer at the Oktoberfest! Its just two days to go now until I leave and the butterflies in my stomach are busy building an ark in anticipation of a massive beer flood! I haven’t had a brewski in 2 weeks and thought it wise to get a few down my Gregory Peck before I land in Munich. Without having built up a tolerance to beer, although very rarely, I have been known to capsize early………

News that Ebay have bought out the Swedish/Estonia company Skype as created waves not just in the Tech Media but also Finance Media. The deal is purportedly worth $4 billion if all goes well and stands to make the alliance one of the strongest internet based businesses in the world. Amazing when you consider the guy who started Skype is the same character who started Kazaa. I am a little disapointed in the deal because I can see the end of the road for free Skype calls, but there is no denying the business sense in the deal, or the greatness of both products. I love Skype and I am a HUGE fan of Ebay and I will be a massive supporter in the years to come.

Ebay in the UK is a dream, think of anything you want and it’ll be on Ebay for sure. I have bought and sold cars on Ebay a lot easier than any other vehicle related transaction in my life! Long may the pikey superstore thrive.

Just a quick note before I leave for Wales. Apple have lauched their much anticpated new product. It got released a few days ago I just forgot to post about it.

Wow, what an awesome piece of equipment. I can still recall Patrick having kittens in the back of the car on the way back from Strandloper back in 2001 when he was telling us about the revolution that is the “iPod”.

I knew there was a reason not to get the now older ipods - forget the fact that I owned an ipod shuffle for 4 days before I left it in a suit for some drycleaner to take home as a gift to himself.

This is more like a gadget I can get used to owning. If you need an idea on what to get me for Christmas look no further than the black ipod nano. NO, I don’t mind if you combine my Christmas and Birthday presents cheapskates!!

All right I really don’t want this site to turn into a South African political forum but I have to get a word in about the difference between South Africa and the UK.

Little bit of background first: We have a new Deputy President after our previous one was sacked for embezzlement or something like that, her name is unpronouncable to anybody outside SA - Phumzile Mlambo Nguka. It’d be easier if we called her by the nickname George W gave her when they met at a cocktail party recently. Can you picture him trying to get her real name right. Thats farking funny He struggled but you’d forgive him for that considering Tony B would have cocked it up horribly as well. Anyway Dubya and Dicky C decided to call her Pammy Gookya and I kinda like it so I reckon we should all start using it.

She’s a very grown up girl so I’m sure she could take it.

Now easy out there, don’t start accusing me of being patronising or chauvinist ‘cos I said “She’s a very grown up girl”. Those are the very words used by our President Mr Thabo Mbeki (Bo Beggy to Dubs and Dicky). Yes thats right, our president stood up in Parliament and came out with this corker about his new Deputy, well whadya know, the second most powerful person in our country is a “very grown up girl”. Fantastic news!

So grown up in fact that she owns a house and even knows what nepotism is. Her husband being the Director of Public Prosecutions and no doubt her brothers, sisters, cousins etc working in some part of the government. You’d think that with her being the DP of the most powerful country in Africa and her husband supposedly responsible for executing the law, it wouldn’t be wise if you were a petty burglar to break into her house. Well you’d be wrong, SA thieves stop at nothing and broke into her private house and stole her laptop, cell phone etc. Allegedly her husband was passed out drunk asleep at the time and police guards - members of the elite VIP protection unit - who are assigned to protect her and the residence around the clock did not see or hear the burglars.

I liked this comment from the fishbowl website:

In what is even more embarrassing than the original security breach, the two suspects in the burglary on Deputy President Phumzile Mhlambo-Ncguka’s home have been released through a lack of evidence.

Whilst many people used to theft and crime carried poorly hidden grins when the Deputy President was found to be a victim, they will be wringing their hands with glee now that she has been a victim of the all too familiar “charges dropped through lack of evidence” scenario. Let’s hope that this may spark Phumzile into action to address the vast shortcomings in our policing service.

I used to like listening to Cape Talk radio every now and then when I lived in Cape Town so over the last couple of days during my one and a half hour drive into work I thought I’d try listening to one of London’s talk radio stations LBC. What a load of crap! The biggest issue in the last few days has been the outrage caused by the police no longer patroling the beat in pairs but rather walking on “opposite sides of the street but always within eyesight of each other to make the police more approachable to citizens.” Oh and did I mention the current biggest sporting event of all history currently taking place, yes thats right…..drumroll…The Ashes.

So which is a more exciting country, well if SA had english football, a strong currency and Easyjet you can be damn sure I wouldn’t be eating shite food and hearing crappy cricket updates all day long!

Soccer AM and Super Saturday cancel each other out in the above comparison! And work aside ‘cos I’ll always have a schweet job, this one being particularly kiff ek se.

Long live Pammy Gookya!!

Hey, if I can’t have a party in New Orleans over New Years then maybe I can go fishing. Classic!

Jeez this month is gonna be busy!!

First off this weekend I am going up to North Wales to visit my Dad. He has just had a knee replacement operation and if anyone can empathise with him its me! He lives in a beautiful welsh village called Bangor-on-Dee.

The following weekend is the big’un!!! Myself and Grant Davis (aka Kramer) are flying to Munich, Germany for three days of mayhem. The opening weekend of the Oktoberfest will never be the same after we tear through the tents. Schottenhamel, Hippodrom and Hofbrauhaus are the targets this year. We managed to secure a very cheap last minute deal but the flight there takes us a full 11 hours via Dusseldorf. Oh well, its defiinitely worth it!

The following weekend is looking increasingly likely that we will have a crew together for the A1GP at Brands Hatch. Should be memorable, even more so if Thomas Schekter (son of Jody former World Champ) takes SA to victory.

Finally the last weekend in September will be spent in a 16th century manor house down in Torquay for Brendan Grayskull’s birthday. Yes, the man with the grayest hair in the world is only turning thirty! Scary man. Should be fun, especially when Hatcher and Adam, the novice tugboat captains are likely to be involved.

I’ve got that song in my head, “Lookin’ back on the track for a little green bag,
Got to find just the kind or I’m losin’ my mind” ………………think its just a feel good song, one that comes into your head when something exciting has just happened. I have just booked our trip to Oktoberfest and I can’t stop grinning and singing that song!

Lastly before I capsize laughing, I must tell you about the cricketing euphoria that has swept this sad (sporting terms) little island. They are on the brink of beating Australia in a series called The Ashes. England are leading 2-1 going into the last five-day game. People have gone cricket mad eg. Trafalgar square has been booked for the victory celebration and the other day I read that Flintoff reckons England can dominate the game for the next tens years. Hahahahahahaha………………………………..

All the news has been about this being as important as England winning the football world cup in 1966 and the rugby world cup in 2003. They have seriously lost the plot, its embarrassing that the entire country places that much importance on beating a has-been Australian cricket team. I can’t wait till we stuff them both, perhaps the smirk on face might arise sooner than that, England could still lose this test…………….hahaha……I don’t like it when the Aussies win and I would prefer to see the English win it………but jeez that would be funny……..

A lot has been happening recently, so much stuff that I haven’t been able to post any decent story recently. I’ll avoid giving the old chestnut about my home computer not working.

A quick update on recent events which I may be able to elaborate on later if I get the time. Read the rest of this entry »